Dreaming of Silver Roses

     “A German woman once recounted to me how the Americans, in the last days of World War II, had bombed her hometown, a charming North Bavarian place with a splendid church and no military value. The town was a mess: Bodies lay unburied, water and electricity were out, and food supplies were unmoved. What did the townspeople do? She shrugged, “We waited for the Americans to come and tell us what to do.”  (Roskin, 2011)

When you have lived with someone constantly telling you what to do, other options seem impossible. Even in the wake of total devastation, you can’t think. You can’t move. You freeze. You wait for someone who seems to have power to take up commanding you again. You wait for soemone who looks like they have control to shout the orders. You have been told you have no answers, you can’t do, you aren’t (fill in the blank) for so long that you cannot move. You know you’ll make a mistake. You know you won’t have the courage. You know you won’t have the answer. So you just stand still. Until finally something inside you makes you realize that even when you are standing still two things are happening. You are dying doing nothing. And life will go on around you. It will not stop. It will not stop if you fail. It will not stop if you suceed. You must move and catch up. But it is terrifying. It is painful. It is seemingly impossible.

     I have found in my life recently that what is most helpful to me are examples… not dictators, but positive examples. Those who call you out to come on and move, but who won’t do it all for you. Those who have guidance and resources and experience you don’t have who have made it and tell you YOU CAN TOO. Even when you can’t believe it. They get under your shoulders. They bear your burden with you, not for you. They heal even if it hurts. They may have to push a little. They may have to fight you as you fight your terror and the world around you. But they don’t quit on you or for you. Rebuilding is so hard and energy consuming. But it will happen with you as a participant or as material it consumes to get it done. The world ”grows” on.  

Reference

Roskin, M.G. (2011). Countries and concepts: Politics, geography, culture (11th ed.). New York: Longman

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Filed under: life on March 15th, 2011